Like coming home after a long trip away, coming back to the sensation of oneness allows me to drop all my baggage on the floor. I empty my mind like the Buddhist principle “No Mind”. I’m emptying my vessel, so that it may be filled with love.
I’m not talking about my egoistic, conditioned love, as when I say “I’ll love you IF you satisfy my preconceived notions of appreciating me first.” The love that comes through me is a flowing river of nurturing and acceptance that emanates through all beings. Connecting through love-vibration I am not separate, but one with you. I’m not lonely or fearful, I feel you.
Realization of this, not just with my mind, but with every cell in my being, allows a bliss like never experienced before. I am at ease.
All my past addictions, depression and dis-ease came from not being at ease. I felt a great dis-ease because I felt a magnetic pull to oneness that I could not seem to satisfy by myself. I didn’t know what to do about it. The friction of frustration hardened the cells in my physical body, stymying my energy flow. I drooped. My shoulders hung down and I couldn’t muster enough interest to get up in the morning. Instead of a rushing river of love I was a bucket of ennui. I could not wait for Friday night to run out and disconnect my mind and emotions by guzzling espresso martinis.
My unconscious, habitual, learned responses were a way for me to close myself off from the sharp pain of conscious separation; the fruit plucked from the Tree of Knowledge. I closed myself off from the frustration of that fruition. But I also closed myself off from peace, from love, from joy, from prana.
I know I wasn’t alone here, living a life devoid of meaning, or meaningful relationships to anyone around me. We live a life devoid of meaningful relationship to our environment, devoid of meaningful relationship to the universe. That is sad. We, the universe, our environment, are all one. Everyone and everything is a constant flow of eternal, universal, prana. We are all becoming, becoming, becoming, or not.
Quantum Science explains that all matter is energy vibrating at differing levels of consciousness. This vibrating stream of consciousness-energy is prana. This prana penetrates all things, becomes all things, IS all things.
Yoga is the yoke, the way we bring this prana into ourselves. What we call meditation is the practice of shutting the outward flow of chatter long enough to hear the inward flowing “Yes” that is running like a river through us, always. Our job is to open up to it and get out of it’s way and be vibrating transmitters for it.
Yoga asanas are a way for us to open the energy channels in our physical bodies. Through Yoga we shape our clay vessel to hold this prana. Through meditation we shape it in our mind, in our knowing.
Flying Thai Yoga is a tantric practice of expanding our consciousness further to include another person. We allow our individualization to dissipate through the deep mindfulness necessitated by the practice. We lose the Self in the mirror our partner creates, creating one body from two, uniting and magnifying the prana flow.
Coming together creates the energy of conscious attraction, like bringing two magnets together. We will feel the exact same force of attraction as that created between two magnets when held an inch apart. Then, when we touch, our partners become us. We become one breath, one mind, one conscious vessel for flowing prana.
We both start out facing the sun in Surya Namaskara, honoring our responsibility to the universe, which has been individualized as our bodies. We turn inward toward the other, see the life in their eyes as all our lovers, all mothers, all daughters. Bringing our left hand to their heart we feel the breath, the heart beat, the blood flowing through the body, the vibration of their individualization. I bring my attention away from the sensation of my own form and realize our two forms as one.
We stand, feet touching, bowing so our third eye’s touch in Namaste. Virabhadrasana Two, side by side, heart to heart, twisting down
Utthita ParsvaKonasana reversing into back facing Parivrtta Trikonasana, our high reaching fingers grasp each other’s, counter balancing one another as, in turn, we back bend, opening our hearts to the world. We return to standing now holding both hands. I transition to a prone position and pull her hips on to my feet and lift her into the air, arriving into Folded Leaf. I place my hands on her back to feel the rhythm of our synchronizing breaths. Making our arms straight and stiff I push her vertically up as I find her shoulders with my feet, lifting her further into the sky.
This needs my complete and utter one-pointed focus. My “mind-less” mindfulness and pranayama of flowing love allow an inner calm that comes from a sense of oneness to the Source. God, the absolute, what ever you call it. I live in this peace, love and joy.