This is a moving, conscious experience of tantric expansion and ecstatic oneness from a student.”
This evening I found myself outside under the stars wading barefoot, ankle deep in the crystal clear water of the pool. There is something I find so nurturing and rejuvenating about being in, near, or around a body of water that makes me feel right at home. Surrounded by large overgrown trees and flowers I took in the beauty of the moment.
I thought about my day, and the expectations I had about meeting my teacher that had fallen through. My teacher had been teaching me one-on-one about tantra, the path of sacred sexuality. Tantra is the union of two beings through the physical, emotional, spiritual, and energetic bodies, yet this ancient practice has brought me into a deeper connection with myself. As if through loving another, it has ignited this growing spark to love and honor the divine within me.
So on this beautiful evening, I found myself all alone under the stars, without a lover, friends, or any set agenda to distract me from me. Poolside, I laid down a towel over the bare earth, stripped down out of my clothing, and lit some sage in ritual as I breathed in it’s cleansing effects. As I waved the glowing sage around my naked body I relaxed into the moment and felt at peace with myself and the world around me. Sitting on my knees in prayer position, I began moving my body around in slight circular motions, drawing my life force energy in and upward through my chakras towards my heart. I placed my hands on both of my power centers, breathing, as I let go and allowed an energy greater than myself to flow through my being. My hands and body began pulsating in orgasmic waves, as the energy rippled throughout my body. Grinning from ear to ear I was just floating in the bliss and beauty of the moment.
I realized that I don’t need anything or anyone outside of me in order to attain this magnetic, powerful, divine state of being. I can have just as much fun playing with the life-giving force of the universe, solo, as I can with a partner. I truly am my own beloved, and the love I generate within myself can (and will) only be intensified when I eventually make the conscious decision to unite with another. They say that we can only love another as much as we love ourselves. So although connecting with a partner can be a beautiful union, maybe the real lesson is in loving and celebrating the beauty and divinity with ourselves first. As we rejoice in love for ourselves we simultaneously open ourselves up to loving another. Once we have created this sacred space in honor of the divine, precious, powerful beings that we are, then what could be more beautiful than two whole and complete beings coming together in love, to intensify, unite, and share the God & Goddess energies they embody. It is the sacred dance of the masculine & feminine, the yin & yang, and is the true balancing act of the universe.
Tonight, I discovered an immense power I hold within myself, and a deeper love for the powerful being that I am. As I open up to this transformative energy I feel myself growing, evolving, and stepping into the power of the Goddess I know I am destined to be. I give many thanks and gratitude to my teacher, Elet, for seeing in me something that I could not see in myself….and for teaching me even when he’s not physically teaching me.
“We only had time for three sessions, but what this beautiful shakti came to know through her entire being, it has taken others lifetimes to realize. The truth of Tantra is SELF liberation from the dream of individuals and SELF expansion into God conscious orgasmic bliss. (satchitananda) pure being, pure knowing, pure bliss.”